Scary Close by Donald Miller

I pre-ordered this book when I read about it coming out. Partly I pre-ordered it because I read Blue Like Jazz by Donald Miller but also because if you pre-ordered it you got two freebies with it, the ebook of Blue Like Jazz, and a soundtrack of 16 songs that Miller made in honor of the book. The sound track seemed like a fun idea. I just downloaded it and started to play it for the first time.

It turned out, though, that I liked the book more than I'd even expected I would. I kind of devoured it. I have been thinking a lot about how to be more...essential? ...transparent? ...vulnerable? Not sure of the best word. I think of it as "Mavis being Mavis," not trying to be someone or something I'm not, not worrying so much about what other people might think of me or what I say or do.

This book fed right into this line of thinking. Miller wrote about the process of changing himself while falling in love with his now wife, Betsy. It's about relationships and things he learned about how to be good at relationships. It talks a lot about marriage and falling in love, but you can take what he writes about and apply it to any relationship.

When my brother Dan died, as I've written about before, one of the many things I realized was how important relationships are. It was beautiful to see Dan's friends, including co-workers, and family surround him with faithfulness and love. It made me not just realize but start to live with the priority of building good relationships with whoever is in my life. This book is full of thoughts and stories about how to do that.

It's got some helpful kind of self help type of tips, like 5 kinds of manipulation, but I didn't really feel like I was reading a self help book. It felt like Donald Miller was just talking to me about what he went through and learned. He has a friendly style of writing. It never bored me or seemed like a slog.

I think it'd be a good one for my two sons and wife and girlfriend. There are even online courses for pre-marriage, marriage and parenting. Quite a package deal.